Phillipians 4:6-7

Philippian 4: 6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
This is "my bible verse" It has gotten me through some things! It was my mantra when I was pregnant with Kathryn.
I have a "personal blog" saved in the cloud that only God and I read. I write to God there. I write my prayers. Sometimes I rant and rave a little bit. It really is just a long word document. I started in October 5, 2009 when I was worried about the direction my church was going. Around August 2010, I started out each entry by copying and pasting my bible verse. It is supposed to remind me to stop worrying. It reminds me to give my worries to God. I pray/write about my kids, my husband, and today I wrote a prayer about someone I hardly know who may have to have heart surgery soon. I try to remember to thank God when He answers my prayers. I know that he always answers them, but sometimes I don't see the answer as readily as other times.
One of the answer in the last few years that I have seen -- my new church. Yes it was painful to watch my old church make such a radical change, but God brought me to an interim church and then to a wonderful new church home.
There are many answers to my prayers about my kids. Being a mom increases one's prayer life -- and having them move into adulthood just brings more prayers.
When I don't see the answer, I try to leave it with God and assume he is answering "that isn't the best for you" or "not now".
I pray for some friends that aren't Christian. I can't explain my faith. Some people are much better at that than I am. I once had a person ask how I could be such a logical thinker and believe in Christ at the same time. I don't think a person has a list of things we have to get done here on earth to make it to heaven -- well we have the 10 Commandments but those are broken daily by all of us. I truly believe that the only thing that saves us is Christ's grace. Do I think he had to die to save us -- not necessarily, he could have saved us any way God wanted, but that is how he saved us. I hate it when someone say "the bible clearly says "x"..." to me; because frequently the bible also clearly says "y" (I tutor Algebra alot -- hence the x and y) You can't "bible beat" anyone into believing.
So I just keep praying for my friends who don't believe and I sort of think that God's Grace is going to save them too. I know that God's Grace is much bigger than I could ever imagine.

Who's in charge?

I know that God has everything under control, but...

Yesterday at church I cried at seeing what God has done for me in the way of my church family.  A year ago, I was church homeless in that I had left a church and was visiting another one, but I knew I wouldn't join it.  In July Abiding Grace Lutheran had their first worship on my birthday.  We have been meeting at a Montessori school gym since early fall.  Now the building is going to be sold and we will have to find a new place.  Worry much -- no because I know God has done wonderful things for Abiding Grace and have no reason to worry.

Last night, I was checking my email before I went to bed.  I received the unfortunate news that a friend's fiance had died in a car accident.  Why???  They were so in love.  His first marriage had ended in divorce and now he had fallen in love again.  Why did she die?  As I ask "where was God?"  I know he was there holding her as she died in her car and whisked her away to heaven-- but why?  What about my friend who is left here on earth without her.  I know that God has everything under control, but ...   All night I kept waking up and each time I said a prayer for my friend.

Kevin and Amy are moving to Austin.  I know that God has been holding Kevin in the palm of His hand for the last 24 years.  So I keep praying that he keeps holding him and I add a prayer that he finds a job and that Amy doesn't hurt my son.  I like Amy, but a mom sometimes sees a son's love interest as someone who might hurt her son.  I pray that doesn't happen!

I know that God has everything under control so I keep praying and I keep hoping.  I know that the final victory has been won.  The "battles" here on earth are just piddly little ones in comparison! 

If you want to read a better blog -- read Kevin's  fakingmyway.wordpress.com

Kat's is good too, but she hasn't updated lately.

Home Repairs

This week the painters are at the house painting ceilings, refinishing cabinets and doors.  It is stressing me out.  My house is usually my sanctuary, but this week it is just a mess.  I have had to sleep in another room one night, wash  my  hair in the kitchen sink, apply new makeup in the Walmart parking lot where I had just bought the makeup because I couldn't get to the bathroom where my makeup is located.

The painters are very nice people, they are doing what we hired them to do -- but I will be so glad when they are done!

I'm nervous about living in a smaller house but I will be glad to have it all on one floor.  I loved having two stories for a long time, but now, I'm ready for a one story house.  We will see if the architect can make the third bedroom/office a little more livable.

Madre

I became a madre 24 years ago today!  It's been the best job I have ever had.  It's also been the most challenging and rewarding job I have ever had! (mostly rewarding)

Happy Birthday Kevin!

Christmas Letter

I always write a Christmas letter and now that I have Creative Memories Storybook Plus, I incorporate pictures.  I do feel weird about writing the letter though -- I know some people hate them.  They say it is usually just people bragging.  Well it isn't so much bragging as it is highlighting the good things -- I leave out the stuff that I don't want to remember or relive!  I mostly just send this to people not in town with me to catch up.  I LOVE getting Christmas letters!

Twinkie

Twinkie was our first cat.  She came into our life because Kathryn wanted a cat and Mark had a friend who had a cat but couldn't keep her.  We adopted her in April 1997.  Kathryn was thrilled to get a cat but Twinkie really liked Kevin best.  She was a good cat.  She was quiet, but when she was hungry she would tear open the bag if we weren't home to fill her bowl!

I didn't think I would ever want a cat.  But because of Twinkie we ended up owning two other cats. Unfortunately she didn't like either of them.

Twinkie was a one of a kind cat and she really liked it when Kevin came home from college on visits.  As I said, she liked him best.

I do hope that I will soon be able to drive into the driveway and not look up to Kev's window to see if she is sitting there.

Twinkie, I hope you are having fun at the Rainbow Bridge...and I hope BC is being nice to you.

Change can be hard -- but it can also be good

I sit here nearly in tears after tossing and turning all night.  Mark and I are seriously thinking about moving.  We had a lot of criteria for a move.  We would only move if we found a better house that was one-story, no pool, in the same town we live in, and on the same side of this town...that was within our price range.  We may have found it but it hasn't been built yet.  We're talking to the realtor today that is selling some new houses.

In anticipation of another change, Kathryn came home this weekend from college.  The three of us will officially join Abiding Grace Lutheran Church and sign its charter today.  I have very mixed emotions here.  I absolutely had to leave my former church because the "senior pastor" preaches stuff that is repugnant to me.  (I totally put the words senor pastor in quotes because I think it is silly that he calls himself the senior pastor when he is the only pastor there.)  I'm grateful I don't have to listen to his hate-filled sermons anymore, but I hate what he did to a loving Christian community.  I feel he is a sick man and I'll leave it at that.  Abiding Grace Lutheran Church is a loving place -- and I would rather be there.

Last night, we spent a couple hours clearing out Kathryn's room.  We have probably 5 bags of trash at the curb, 5 bags to take to GRACE and a couple bags of yarn to donate to a knitting group.  Her room and closet seem bare.  This was where the tossing and turning came from -- I feel we are throwing or giving away her childhood.  She isn't a child anymore, she is an adult, but it is hard to see so much stuff go.  We still have boxes under her bed and her bookcase to clean, but her room is much different now! 

I haven't actually talked to my son in awhile -- I think I need to fix that today.

Time marches on.